You only need a parachute to skydive twice

You know those emails you receive from Aunt Mary with the cute sayings? Usually they tout “life through the eyes of a 5-year-old” or “signs with outrageous text – if you read it the right way.”

Well, I got one today with some very funny sayings in it. One really caught my eye:

You do not need a parachute to skydive.
You only need a parachute to skydive twice.

LimeLeaper

Now, there are many things I’d like to do twice – especially skydiving.

But, what about weight loss? Anyone want to do that twice?
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Damn the Statistics

I hear the phrase “People Don’t Change” a lot, especially from the scientific and medical communities.

I’m just back from a conference focused on scientific studies about change. I’ll acknowledge there are studies that show most patients who encounter life threatening conditions return to old behaviors that caused the problem in the first place. Hence, red meat eventually seduces the heart patient. Nicotine lures the smoker. Weight comes back to the dieter.

I know some people don’t care to change, or it is too threatening to them to do so. Yes, living without food as a soother, friend or emotional barrier can be scarier than death.

But the problem with the general belief that “people don’t change” is: it’s just that – general.

And it’s not necessarily forever.

I fit that picture of “life-threatened-but-not-changing” once.
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What I Like

One of my clients saw my last blog post. She said, “Pat, you don’t like any of the traditional weight loss formulas, do you?”

No, I don’t.

I don’t like them because they don’t work. Trying to follow them took years of effort and rendered me mind-numbingly incapable of success. When I threw them out the window, things started moving in a positive way in my life.
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Keeping Quiet About Goals

If you’ve read my newsletter or this blog for very long, you know there are several instances where the so-called “weight loss experts” and I disagree.

One is the question of divulging goals. Just about every weight loss program, diet book or advice column will tell you to shout your goal from the rooftop.

But, when it came time to really (I mean REALLY) lose the excess weight for good, I didn’t tell a soul. It just didn’t seem necessary. I knew what I had to do. I knew no one could “get it” like it felt inside me. And I’d been sabotaged many times by supposed friends and family members.

So, I loved seeing this video:

Many of the clients who come to me for permanent weight loss coaching don’t talk much with others about their goals either. They’ve gotten serious enough to hire a coach, so they are truly committed. They are sometimes surprised they haven’t been running around telling people about this step in their life. They usually don’t feel the need to binge before coming to their first coaching call either, and that sometimes surprises them too!

But what is telling the whole world supposed to do actually? Invite the world to measure and judge us by our body weight? Shame us when we fail? Or simply open ourselves up to needless comments and interference?

When it’s for real, and it’s about true lifestyle change, I don’t think telling is helpful. At that point, the time for talk is over. It’s time to do.

Born with big hips? Bad girl!

The weight loss industry loves to make us feel bad about ourselves.

Born with a wide-hipped bone structure? Bad girl!

Did you diet so much in your teens that, even though you feel healthy and can maintain your weight easily, you still weigh 30 lbs more than those “magic” weight charts in the doctor’s office? Terrible you!

Despite constant dieting, is your waist roughly the same size as your hips so the latest fashion hip-rider jeans just don’t work for you? Shame on you!

I know I never would have lost over 70 lbs., or maintained that weight loss for over 10 years, if I stayed hooked into the diet biz OR bad feelings about myself. It took me a long time to disengage from commercials and advertising that shows EVERYONE with long legs, taut arms, tiny waist, and big boobs. In real life, every body is unique and very few meet the advertising world’s criteria for beauty.

Instead of feeling bad about ourselves, we should feel bad for them. What a boring, pathetic, lying world they depict!

Take note of this new commercial for Jenny Craig where the absolutely beautiful actress Sara Rue talks about not being able to leave the house (oh, the shame!!) when overweight:

The reason this lovely woman is in for a rude awakening (and I hate to see that) is the route she’s taken in order to lose that weight and fit into those “skinny” jeans. My research taught me that dieting is the key to regain. The body is programmed to regain after sudden loss. (If you don’t understand this, see this audio class.)

The very first Principal in the Catalyst Weight Loss System is “Don’t do anything to lose weight that you can’t do forever” because otherwise you are just setting yourself up for regain.

Do you want it now or do you want it forever?

The approach is different.

Here’s what I also learned losing all that weight. Women (some men, but especially women) buy the skinny=happy equation and waste precious TIME, ENERGY and PASSION worrying about it, pursuing it, failing at it, running their lives by it (staying home!) and making u-turns in life.

WE ARE GIVING AWAY OUR POWER BY BUYING INTO THIS MYTH!

Just think what we could do collectively if we harnessed all that energy and passion and used it to care (really care) for ourselves!